Your child already speaks English better than you do. What should you do about it?

Sooner or later, an evening comes when your child shows you their English homework and asks a question you cannot answer with confidence. Or perhaps you can answer, but only after struggling to recall a rule you learned twenty years ago.

It is an awkward moment, but it does not reflect parental inadequacy; rather, it highlights the difference between two approaches to language education. According to the EF English Proficiency Index 2025 (a study covering 2.2 million test-takers across 123 countries), Ukraine ranks 45th with a score of 526 points—placing it in the "moderate proficiency" band. The same report notes that in more than half of the surveyed countries, speaking proved to be the weakest of the four language skills. In other words, the typical scenario involves someone who can read and understand the language but cannot speak it.

Passive vocabulary does not equate to the words you actually use in conversation

You might easily recognize words like however, actually, probably, and it depends in a text, yet almost never use them yourself. The reason is mechanical: recognizing a word is far easier than retrieving it from memory in a split second during a conversation. This is precisely why communicative teaching methods are used; for instance, the online English school My English World structures its lessons to ensure new vocabulary is immediately put into practice through open-ended questions, brief retellings, role-playing scenarios, and the repeated use of the same structures in new contexts. The brain stores an entry like "it depends" as a pair, and the path to accessing it is always the same: first the Ukrainian word, then the English one. In conversation, this path is too slow. What works instead is constructing a sentence yourself using the new phrase. Methodologically, this is known as the generation effect: an example you create yourself sticks in your memory better than a ready-made one because you invested effort in creating it.

In practice: after learning each new phrase, compose three sentences of your own that relate to your actual life.

"It depends on the weather" — a neutral sentence pulled out of thin air.

"It depends on how late my daughter finishes school" — a sentence you might actually say.

The second one works because the situation requiring it already exists in your life.

Next, follow three steps. Say the sentence out loud rather than just reading it; articulation engages a different memory channel. Two or three days later, compose new sentences without looking at your notes—the effort of recalling the phrase reinforces memory, whereas simply reviewing it does not. Finally, use the phrase at least once in a real-life interaction, such as in a text message or during a class.

"I studied English in school" means almost nothing.

Parents who studied English in school, at university, or in courses have years of study behind them—yet they often feel as though nothing has stuck.

In reality, a lot has stuck; it’s just not the right kind of knowledge. Years of study provided knowledge about the language—rules, tenses, exceptions, and the ability to recognize words in a text. The skill of using the language develops differently: through actually saying something in that language and receiving a response.

Compare these two tasks. In the first type of task, you must choose the correct option from four choices: the answer is already right in front of you, and you simply need to recognize it. In the second, you have to describe what you did yesterday: recall vocabulary, select a grammatical structure, construct sentences, and develop your thoughts. Both tasks are necessary but train different skills, and the second type is encountered far more frequently in real life.

It is not a matter of aptitude or age. It is a matter of how many times a person has constructed an English sentence on their own—without having answer choices right in front of them.

A proficiency level is not a grade, but a list of what you can actually do.

Parents often describe their level in terms of school grades or as "somewhere in the middle." The CEFR describes levels differently—based on specific actions a person is capable of performing.

Level

What a person can actually do

A2

Communicate in predictable everyday situations; describe a past event using short, simple sentences.

B1

Handle most travel situations; explain and justify an opinion using simple language.

B2

Communicate quite fluently with a native speaker; participate in work discussions; articulate a position in detail.

Based on Council of Europe descriptors (CEFR Companion Volume, 2020).

This framework is also useful for parents because a child’s progress follows this specific scale. When you see a level designation in your child’s learning materials, it indicates a specific set of skills rather than a numerical score.

Three common thoughts that hold people back at the start

Typical thought

What lies behind it

"It’s easier for a child; their brain works differently."

A child is less afraid of making mistakes. However, an adult grasps structure more quickly and knows how to learn systematically—this compensates for other factors.

"I need to start from scratch"

You already have a passive vocabulary. The goal isn't to learn the words all over again, but to learn how to retrieve them from memory quickly.

"I'll start when I have more time"

Speaking skills improve through frequency, not duration. Twenty minutes four times a week yields better results than three hours once a week.

What works when time is truly limited

There is no single universal exercise, but there are a few methods that produce results faster than others.

Speak out loud from the very first week—not "once I've brushed up on my grammar." Pick a topic and talk about it for 40–60 seconds without switching to Ukrainian: describe how your day went or what you plan to do.